Thursday, January 5, 2012


I think it's probably pretty clear by now that I'm not particularly handy, or helpful, around the house, although there are things that if I didn't do them would never get done. One of these is cutting the brats' hair. Now, I'm not saying I give them any great haircuts, but neither were the places that were charging me $40 and I figured I could give my own kids a crappy haircut for free rather than paying for it.

But in general, a Do-It-Yourselfer I am not. I firmly believe in paying someone to, say, snake the drain in the shower when my hair clogs it up every 6 months. (I shed like a cat. Sorry.) Or to clean the gutters, rather than Ted climbing up some 50-foot ladder and reaching over the edge into dead carcasses, rotten leaves and God-knows-what else. So it's kind of a big deal that I am embarking on my first home DIY project. I guess I have been reading so much Young House Love that I think I can do anything.

The project I have chosen to attack is that of our dining room chairs. The two armchairs at the head and foot of the table are covered in dark green velvet slipcovers that I love and came from Pottery Barn (as did the chairs themselves):

But the side chairs came with the table, and I have never really liked the material on the seats. In fact, when we bought the table and chairs, I wasn't wearing my glasses and thought that the chairs were covered in a neutral off-white material. Once we got home (well, after a few weeks, if you must know), I took a closer look and realized the material was checked. Like gingham. In tan. BARF. And over time they have gotten, well, worn is probably the kindest way to put it:

Sorry for the terrible photos - we have literally one light in the dining room and it's virtually impossible to take a picture without shadows. So the side chairs are gross, and besides, they don't match the other chairs, which might not bother a normal person but drives me fucking crazy:

Anyway, being the forward-thinking gal that I am, when I got the armchairs and slipcovers, I bought three extra slipcovers, thinking that I could use the material to have someone recover the side chairs. This was about two years ago. What with Ted taking away my credit cards, and me trying to lead you assholes by example, that "someone" is now me. But I can do this, I know I can. I've already taken one chair apart:

And cut up one of the extra slipcovers, trying to get a piece big enough to cover the seat part:

Once Ted gets home and shows me where he keeps the staple gun, it is on like Donkey Kong.

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